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Friday, December 14, 2012

13 Signs the Apocalypse will Commence Next Friday

Hola comrades!
After a weird week of crazy-work-week-during-the-holidays-hectic-ness, and a visit to one of the art shows where some of my Mayan Calendar pieces are hanging, I came up with a handy list of signs and portents of the coming End of Days. Read this list while listening to "Cities in Dust" by Siouxie and the Banshees.

Here is your handy guide for understanding the very important date of Friday, December 21st, 2012 or in Long Count-ese,, 3 kankin, 4 ahau.

  1. More people are wearing "tinfoil hats", both real and virtual. That includes the History Channel.(See Fig. 8)
  2. The Mayan Long Count calendar ends on December 21, 2012. Duh. (See Fig. 9). 
  3. Crazy weather and super storms like Katrina and Sandy. Or just call it "Climate change". (See Fig. 10).
  4. Gigantic earthquakes and tsunami wreck entire cities. Loma Prieta was just a blip. (See Fig. 11).
  5. War and terrorism on the rise. Double duh. (See Fig. 12). 
  6. The alignment of the galactic center in the constellation Ophiuchus, a large constellation and apparently a "lost" zodiac sign. (See Fig. 13).
  7. The imminent return of Nibiru or Planet X. We should be seeing it by now though. (See Fig. 14).
  8.  An emerging new World Order that controls the media. They started most of the tinfoil hat nonsense. (See Fig. 15).
  9. Skepticism surrounding the real date of the End of Days: is it the 21st or the 23rd? Even Mesoamericans don't agree. (See Fig. 16).
  10. There is a dark star (brown dwarf) behind our sun called "Nemesis" whose orbit will cause mass extinctions and other stuff to ruin your day. (See Fig. 17).
  11. Nuclear melt downs will wreck entire cities. Chernobyl in the 80's and now Fukushima. (See Fig. 18).
  12. A big carved piece of stone in Mexico, monument 6, mentions the end date of, so it must be true. (See Fig. 19). 
  13. Friendly aliens have been showing us crops circles for years, and they are trying to tell us something important. And apparently the aliens knew the Mayans. (See Fig. 20).

I've left out the last sign 'cause it's a surprise. Fig. 21 will be up before Friday, just in time to drink a toast to the apocalypse.
And you can add a 15th sign of the coming apocalypse: today is a very sad day, so drink your toast to all of the children and adults that lost their lives in Connecticut to another mentally ill murderer.
Peace to all and may you wake up next Saturday morning.

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